24 March 2011
The impending start of the season got me thinking about what Giants fans will be like now that we're World Champs. I mean, it could get bad. Imagine this scenario:
You're at a Giants-Padres game in San Diego, and you're just a neutral observer, a Royals fan in town for a comic book convention. You're watching the game, and the Giants are just killing the Padres. I mean, its like 2-0 and it's only the 7th inning. Padre fans start to file out, knowing they can't score more than 2 runs in three innings, and it's a sad, slow exodus, full of walkers and canes and USS Abraham Lincoln hats. And as these poor old people are leaving, you see a grown man wearing a fake beard, a panda hat, a "Let Timmy Smoke" shirt, and waving an orange rally rag. "Go home, geezers!" he yells. "This is Giants Nation, baby! WOOOOOOOOOO!"
See? Just writing that paragraph makes me dislike the Giants, and that's hard to do. So we have to set some ground rules. What is acceptable for Giants fans to do and what puts us in the Red Sox/Yankees category of obnoxious gloaters?
Here's a handy guide.
Can I gloat?
Can I beat up people?
Can I yell "World Champs" at a fan of an opposing team that is beating us?
Yes, but only this year. Unless we win again. Then you can do it again next year.
Can I ever utter the phrase "Giants Nation"?
Can I ever utter the phrase "we've got too much awesome in our bats!"
Not if I'm sitting next to you.
What CAN I do?? This sucks.
You can throw back at all the haters all the hate they've thrown at us. Jesus said that was ok.
Like "Fix Your Teeth?"
Yes. You can tell Phillies fans to fix their teeth.
LIke "Hippy Trash."
Yep. And you can make fun of the fact that Carlos Ruiz has 10 kids named Carlos. Even some girls.
Yes. Check it out.
That's just dumb.
They were very polite, by all accounts. We won't be playing them again in October any time soon, so I would let that one go.
Braves Fans? Can I yell "Brooks Conrad!" at them?
Only if provoked.
Fair game, but speak up. They might not be able to hear you.
It's a tough line to walk. I think in general, we want to avoid becoming hated but also avoid being perceived as lucky one-time winners that everyone else can ignore. The Giants should become a loveable dynasty, a team that keeps winning and winning but the average fan doesn't mind because the alternative is the boring Red Sox or Yankees or Phillies.
Ross injured. Wilson injured. Cain battling elbow issues. Belt headed to Fresno. Tejada as terrible as we all expected, if by "we all" we mean "everyone other than Brian Sabean." This spring was going so well, and now it sucks. How much to worry?
Well, everyone has injuries, and it's better to get them out of the way early if they're small. I'd rather Cody Ross miss 10 spring training game five regular season games than go on the DL in June. But we also want to start out hot and not have to play catchup all season. The Giants' early schedule is actually pivotal in that most of it comes against bad teams but on the road. How we do in April might go a long way toward deciding our fate.
Wilson's injury is not a huge deal if it's a short-term situation. Let's say you miss 15 games. Well, for starters, you have to figure you win only 9 of those 15 games. And then you figure you win 3 of those 9 games in blowout fashion or at least by 4 runs or more. So you're talking 6 games he might miss. I think our bullpen can absorb that. But if the injury lingers, or impacts his performance later in the season, then that's a substantial loss.
Maybe we should just stop playing baseball until next Thursday. Who's with me?
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